Am I a dreamer or a doer?

PART 153: It might be interesting to share how we pulled off living in Italy for part of the year. I will post some steps and what we are learning along the way.

We love every minute of it, and what was once a dream is our life!

We live in Tuscany in the Fall, then return again in the Spring, and spend the rest of the time in California (as I explained in a previous blog, we only live in Italy for part of the year).

Step 1: As we explore areas in Italy, we discover some gems worth sharing. Some are well-known tourist magnets, and others are lesser-known but always amazing. 

This week, let's explore whether I am someone who dreams of moving to Italy or someone who actually does it.

Step 2: Qualities of a Dreamer

1. Visionary Thinking: Dreamers envision possibilities and possess a broad outlook on the future. They see the bigger picture and set long-term goals.

2. Strong Vision: They have a vision of what they want to achieve in the future.

3. Creative and Imaginative: Dreamers often have vivid imaginations and draw inspiration from new and innovative ideas.

4. Motivated by Passion: They are driven by a desire to create something meaningful and impactful.

Step 3: Qualities of a Doer

1. Action-Oriented: Doers focus on taking action and accomplishing tasks.

2. Detail-Oriented: They focus on the specific steps and details required to achieve their goals.

3. Persistent: Doers are willing to put in the effort and work hard to overcome challenges.

4. Practical: They concentrate on making things happen in the real world.

Step 4: Living in Italy: Dreamers and Doers

I can't count how many times friends and acquaintances have said, "I wish we could do what you're doing!" I always feel like responding, "You can; just take a small step."

Many of us aspire to a bigger life. I remember when I worked for a nonprofit in Washington, DC, sitting in my cubicle and dreaming of a different life in a different place. Back then, I had no idea how to change my circumstances, so dreaming helped me cope.

Two significant events shifted me from being a dreamer to becoming a doer:

1. I became increasingly determined to have a bigger life. I had my career, friendships, routines, and a stable life in the U.S., but that wasn't enough. I wanted more.

2. I lost several close friends who passed away before their time. This made me recognize that life is short, and if I keep postponing my dreams, I may never achieve them.

Step 5: Is anything wrong with dreaming?

Dreaming is often the first step toward taking action: I can't reach a goal or complete a task without first envisioning it. There's nothing wrong with dreaming, and it can sometimes help us navigate difficult circumstances.

However, dreaming becomes an obstacle when it replaces taking action. Unless I am willing to turn my dream into reality, it will remain only in my mind.

So, how can I take the next steps toward something as daunting as moving to Italy?

Step 6: Baby steps and chunking

I taught high school social studies in Los Angeles for 25 years, and one important lesson I learned from my students was the practice of "chunking."

"Mr., I can't do this! It's too hard!" was a phrase I often heard during my early years of teaching. Since my approach was project-based, some projects were extensive, such as creating an illustrated booklet about World War II. Many students felt intimidated and believed they couldn't master the task.

Then, I discovered the technique of "chunking." This involves breaking the project into smaller, manageable parts.

"All you have to accomplish today is to write two paragraphs about the beginnings of World War II, using the outline I will provide and your notes."

By dividing the larger project into bite-sized pieces and setting daily goals, rather than facing the entire assignment at once, my students completed their booklets with ease. In fact, we even visited a middle school where the students presented their booklets individually to the younger students.

This same method can be applied to establishing a life in Italy.

Eventually, we realized that we didn't need to understand every aspect of living in Italy right away. Instead, we could take small steps and learn along the way. We could "chunk it."

Step 7: All or nothing

Our journey began with a two-week trip to Italy during my winter break. This allowed us to explore different areas of interest, and we decided to start our Italian adventure in Puglia, where our friends live part-time.

We later returned for two months during the summer, and then we leased a place for a year.

During this time, we realized two important things:

• First, it didn't have to be all or nothing; we could live in Italy for part of the year while maintaining our residency in California. This arrangement better suited our commitments than a complete move.

• While our time in Puglia was wonderful, primarily because of our local friends, it felt too much like Southern California for us. We didn't travel all the way to Italy just to replicate our Californian lifestyle. Therefore, we searched for an area in Tuscany that better aligned with our interests and desires for history, culture, and more, and ultimately, we decided to buy a house there.

Step 8: Making it happen and learning along the way

Stepping out of the dream and into reality meant taking a small step: coming to Italy for two weeks and staying in the area we were interested in. The next step was to stay for an entire summer.

During our first two years of establishing a life in Italy, we rented a place. Purchasing our home in Tuscany felt like a logical next step rather than a radical leap.

Taking it one step at a time worked for us, helping us turn our dreams into reality.

Could this approach also work for you?

More next time.

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